MOTHER. FUCK.

All the local stations are calling it. Coakley conceded. Somehow Massachusetts elected a forced-birth advocating, birth-certificate denying, Kennedy-hating teabagger.

I am deeply ashamed of my state right now. Congratulations, fellow voters. If you’re a wealthy, straight, white, able-bodied, Christian man between 35 and 60 who has a recession-proof job, high-quality, low-cost health insurance, and a small enough heart to only care about people just like you, Scott Brown might not be that bad for you.

Anyone know of any expatriate newspapers looking for a good editor?

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Issues! Get yer fresh, hot issues!

As I’ve mentioned before, the only time I ever see political ads* here in Boston is when my rabbit ears pick up a station that reaches into southern New Hampshire, but even I am not safe from the scourge of the new “issues ads.” Last year, SCOTUS re-legalized “issue ads” that mention candidates by name, paving the way for big companies to throw shitloads of money at campaigns with essentially no regulation or oversight. So for months I’ve been seeing the US Chamber of Commerce’s attempts to influence the New Hampshire Senate race. No prizes for guessing which candidate is the pro-life, anti-gun control incumbent and which is the former-governor-who-raised-taxes-to-fund-schools challenger.

And there’s plenty more where these came from!

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*You’re probably thinking, “She must mean national political ads. Of course she sees television ads for local candidates.” Not so! Kennedy’s been in the Senate since my parents were in diapers, and Kerry joined him when I was in swaddling clothes, so even on the rare occasion someone decides to challenge them, they don’t bother running TV ads. No one below Senate level seems to have the war chest for air time except on the public access cable channel, which, of course, doesn’t come in on my rabbit ears.